Whatever and Ever Amen - Ben Folds Five
One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces
September seventy-five I was forty-five inches high
My mom said by Christmas I would have
A badass mother G.I Joe
For your little minds to blow
I still got beat up after class, yeah
Now I�m big and important
One angry dwarf
And 200 solemn faces are you
If you really want to see me
Check the papers and the T.V
Look who�s telling who what to do
Kiss my ass goodbye
Don�t give me that bullshit
You know who I am
I�m your nightmare little man
Vic you stole my lunch money made me cry
Jane remember second grade
Said you couldn�t stand my face
Rather than kiss me you said you�d rather die
I�m big and important
One angry dwarf
And 200 solemn faces are you
If you really want to see me
Check the papers and the T.V
Look who�s telling who what to do
Kiss my ass goodbye
You�ll be sorry one day, yes you will, yes you will
You shouldn�t push me around cause I will, yes I will
You will be sorry when I�m big, yes you will, yes you will
You will be sorry
Now I�m big and important
One angry dwarf
And 200 solemn faces are you
If you really want to see me
Check the papers and the T.V
Look who�s telling who what to do
Kiss my ass
Kiss my ass, kiss my ass goodbye now
Kiss my ass, kiss my ass goodbye now
Kiss my ass, kiss my ass goodbye now
Kiss my ass, kiss my ass goodbye now
September seventy-five I was forty-seven inches high
September seventy-five, September seventy-five
Fair
Well he shouted out his last word
And he stumbled through the yard
And she shattered her last china plate
And spun off in the car
When he lunged onto the hood
She stopped to tell him she�d been wrong
He was thrown head over heels into the traffic coming on
But then, all is fair
All is fair in love
Did you get my other letters
Sometimes I think I ought to call
Cause you know I often wonder if you open them at all
Every couple nights or so
You know you pop into my dreams
I just can�t get rid of you
Like you got rid of me
Oh, but I send my best
Cause God knows you've seen my worst
Yeah well, all is fair
All is fair in love
Yeah
All this breathing in, never breathing out
All this breathing in, never breathing out
All this breathing in, never breathing out
Well I guess she made her way through the mob
Too late to hear him say
That he�d gotten all he wanted
A crowd to watch him bear the pain
He�d been keeping in
(So what) So what?
All is fair
All is fair in love
Yeah well, all is fair
All is fair in love
Am I right?
Am I right?
I�m lonely and I�m right
I�m lonely and I�m right
Yeah
Brick
Six a.m., day after Christmas
I throw some clothes on in the dark
The smell of cold, car seat is freezing
The world is sleeping
I am... numb
Up the stairs, to her apartment
She is balled up on the couch
Her mom and dad, went down to Charlotte
They�re not home to find us out
And we drive
Now that I have found someone
I�m feeling more alone
Then I ever have before
She�s a brick, and I�m drowning slowly
Off the coast and I�m headed nowhere
She�s a brick, and I�m drowning slowly
They call her name, at seven-thirty
I pace around the parking lot
And I walked down, to buy her flowers
And sell some gifts that I got
Can�t you see, it�s not me you�re dying for
Now she�s feeling more alone
Then she ever has before
She�s a brick, and I�m drowning slowly
Off the coast and I�m headed nowhere
She�s a brick, and I�m drowning slowly
As weeks went by
They showed that she was not fine
They told me, son, it�s time to tell the truth and
She broke down
And I broke down
Cause I was tired... of lying
Driving back
To her apartment
For the moment, we�re alone
Well, she�s alone, and I�m alone
Now I know it
She�s a brick, and I�m drowning slowly
Off the coast and I�m headed nowhere
She�s a brick, and I�m drowning slowly
Song for the Dumped
1, 2, 3, 4!
So you wanted
To take a break
Slow it down some
And have some space
Well fuck you too
Give me my money back
Give me my money back
You bitch
I want my money back
And don�t forget
And don't forget
To give me back my black t-shirt
I wish I hadn�t
Bought you dinner
Right before you dumped me
On your front porch
Give me my money back
Give me my money back
You bitch
I want my money back
And don�t forget
And don�t forget
To give me back my black t-shirt
Hey, hey!
So you wanted
To take a break
Slow it down some
And have some space
Give me my money back
Give me my money back
You bitch
I want my money back
I want my money back
And don�t forget
Selfless, Cold and Composed
I said what you wanted to hear
And what I wanted to say
So I will take it back
Are all of the dishes intact?
Let them be broken
Broken
It�s easy to be
Easy and free
When it doesn�t mean anything
You remain selfless, cold and composed
You�ve done me no favor
To call and be nice
Telling me I
Can take anything I like
You don�t owe me to be so polite
You�ve done no wrong
You�ve done no wrong
Get out of my sight
It�s easy to be
Easy and free
When it doesn�t mean anything
To remain selfless, cold and composed
Come on baby now throw me a right to the chin
Don�t just stare like you never cared
I know you did
But you just smiled
Like a bank teller
Blankly telling me have a nice life
Come on baby now throw me a right to the chin
Just one sign that will show me that you give a shit
But you just smile politely
And I grow weaker and
I said what you wanted to hear
And what I wanted to say
So I will take it back
It�s easy to be
Easy and free
When it doesn�t mean anything
It doesn't mean anything
You can take anything
You can take anything
So selfless, cold
So selfless, cold
So selfless, cold and composed
Kate
She plays wipeout on the drums
The squirrels and the birds come
Gather round to sing the guitar
Oh, I... have you got nothing to say
When all words fail she speaks
Her mix tapes a masterpiece
Walks through the garden
So the roses can see
Oh, I... have you got nothing to say
And you can see the daisies in her footsteps
Dandelions (dandelions)
Butterflies (butterflies)
I wanna be Kate
Kate
Kate
Kate
Every day she wears the same thing
I think she smokes pot
She�s everything I want
She�s everything I�m not
Oh, I... have you got nothing to say
She never gets wet
She smiles and it�s a rainbow
And she speaks (and she speaks)
And she breathes (yeah and she breathes)
I wanna be Kate
Kate
Kate
Kate
Down by Rosemary and Cameron
She hands out the Bhagavad Gita
I see her round every couple days
I wanna see her so that I can say... hey
Kate
She never gets wet
She smiles and it�s a rainbow
You can see (you can see)
I wanna be Kate
Kate
Kate
Kate
Kate
Smoke
Leaf by leaf and page by page
Throw this book away
All the sadness, all the rage
Throw this book away
Rip out the binding and tear the glue
In all of the grief we never even knew
We had it all along
Now it�s smoke
The things we've written in it
Never really happened
And all the things we've written in it
Never really happened
And all the people come and gone
Never really lived
All the people come have gone
No one to forgive
Smoke
We will not write a new one
There will not be a new one
Another one, another one
Here�s an evening dark with shame
Throw it on the fire
Here�s the time I took the blame
Throw it on the fire
Here is the time when we didn�t speak
It seemed for years and years
Here is a secret no one will ever know
The reasons for our tears
They are smoke
Smoke
Smoke
We will not write a new one
There will not be a new one
Another one, another one
Where do all the secrets live?
They travel in the air
You can smell them when they burn
They travel
Those who say the past is not dead can
Stop and smell the smoke
You keep saying the past is not dead, well
Stop and smell the smoke (you keep saying)
You keep on saying the past is not even past
You keep saying (you keep saying)
We are smoke
Smoke
Smoke
Cigarette
Fred Jones was worn down
From caring for his often
Screaming and crying wife during the day
But he couldn�t sleep at night for fear that she
In a stupor from the drugs that didn�t
Ease the pain
Would set the house ablaze
With a cigarette
Steven's Last Night In Town
Everyone gather round now
Sing us a song
Just in case by tomorrow
It happens he�s gone
For two weeks and seven days
Our fair foreign friend
I have this feeling
We might never see Steven again
But we thought he was gone
But he�s come back again
Last week it was funny
Now the joke�s wearing thin
Cause everyone knows now
That every night now
Will be Steven�s last night in town
He�s charmed everyone here
Except Tamara Easter
Who later revealed to him
Her innermost secrets
Won us over with stories
About Linda McCartney
Lost points with the ladies for saying
He couldn�t love a woman with cellulite
But we thought he was gone
And now he�s come back again
Last week it was funny
Now the joke�s wearing thin
Cause everyone knows now
That every night now
Will be Steven�s last night in town
We were talking bout something
Seems like was funny
And then Steven got quiet
I think Steven was mad
Maybe he wasn�t mad
But we felt very strange in the moment
But the moment was past and forgotten about
But we thought he was gone
But he�s come back again
Last week it was funny
Now the joke�s wearing thin
Cause everyone knows now
That every night now
Will be Steven�s last night in town
Battle of Who Could Care Less
Do you not hear me anymore?
I know it�s not your thing to care
I know it�s cool to be so bored
But it sucks me in when you�re aloof
It sucks me in, it sucks it works
I guess it�s cool to be alone
Will you never rest
Fighting the battle of who could care less
Every day you wake up late
Sometimes I wish I was, that way
And you think Rockford Files is cool
But there are some things
That you would change if it were up to you
So think about your masterpiece
Watch the Rockford Files
Call to see if Paul can score some weed
Do you never rest
Fighting the battle of who could care less
Unearned unhappiness
Well that�s alright I guess
And I�ve got this great idea
Why don�t we pitch it to the Franklin fucking Mint
Fine pewter portraits of general apathy
And major boredom singing...
Whatever and ever amen
Oh well, maybe not, I�ll try again
Well, this should cheer you up for sure
See, I�ve got your old I.D
And you�re all dressed up like the Cure
You never rest
Fighting the battle of who could care less
Unearned unhappiness
You�re my hero I confess
Missing the War
All is quiet
His tired eyes
See figures jotted down
And clothes all strewn around
The bedroom floor
Now nothing�s adding up
And nothing�s making sense
She�s sleeping like a baby
She doesn�t know he wasn�t meant for this
I�m missing the war
I�m missing the war all night
Missing the war
I'm missing the war
He drove home again
Pissed and beaten
It�s really no big deal
It happens all the time
It�s no big deal
I�m missing the war
I�m missing the war all night
Missing the war
I'm missing the war
Till beads of sunlight hit me in the morning
So much time so little to say
Time may fly
And dreams may die
The shaking voice
That tells him go
Still thinks he might
He knows he won�t
I�m missing the war
I�m missing the war all night
Missing the war
I�m missing the war
Missing the war
Missing the war
Evaporated
What I�ve kept with me
And what I�ve thrown away
And where the hell I�ve ended up
On this glary random day
Were the things I really cared about
Just left along the way
For being too pent up and proud
Woke up way too late
Feeling hung over and old
And the sun was shining bright
And I walked barefoot down the road
Started thinking about my old man
It seems that all men
Wanna get into a car and go...
Anywhere
Here I stand
Sad and free
I can�t cry and I can�t see
What I�ve done
Oh God, what have I done?
Don�t you know I�m numb, man
No, I can�t feel a thing at all
Cause it�s all smiles and business these days
And I�m indifferent to the loss
I�ve faith that there�s a soul somewhere
That's leading me around
I wonder if she knows
Which way is down
Here I stand
Sad and free
And I can�t cry and I can�t see
What I�ve done
Oh God, what have I done?
I poured my heart out
I poured my heart out
It evaporated...
See?
Blind man on a canyon�s edge
Of a panoramic scene
Or maybe I�m a kite
That�s flying high and random
Dangling a string
Or slumped over in a vacant room
Head on a stranger�s knee
I�m sure back home
They think I�ve lost my mind
Here I stand
Sad and free
I can�t cry and I can�t see
What I�ve done
Oh God, what have I done?
"Look, man, I got your hidden track right here, pal, right here! Ben Folds is a fucking asshole!"