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This is divided by episode. I've written in even the episodes that don't have any quotes under them. People have been coloured to make reading easier. Mulder is aqua, Scully is gold, and everyone else stays white. 1X79 The Pilot 1X01 Deep Throat 1X02 Squeeze Colton: So, Mulder, what do you think, does this look like the work of little green men? Mulder: Grey. Colton: Excuse me. Mulder: Grey. You said green men, a Reticulan skin tone is actually grey, they're notorious for their extraction of terrestrial human livers. Due to iron depletion in the Reticulan galaxy. Colton: You can't be serious. Mulder: Do you have any idea what liver and onions go for on Reticula? -- Agent Tom Colton talks to 'Spooky' Mulder Scully: Are you suggesting that I go before the Violent Crime Section and present a profile declaring that these murders were done by aliens? Mulder: No, of course not, I find no evidence of alien involvement. Scully: Well, what then? That, that this is the work of a hundred year old serial killer who is capable of overpowering a healthy six foot two businessman. Mulder: And he should stick out in a crowd with ten inch fingers. -- the hunt for Tooms Scully: Oh my God, Mulder, it's smells like, I think it's bile. Mulder: Is there any way I can get it off my fingers quickly without betraying my cool exterior? -- in the nest of Eugene Tooms Scully: Is this what it takes to climb the ladder, Colton? Colton: All the way to the top. Scully: Then I can't wait 'til you fall off and land on your ass. -- Dana tells Colton how it is 1X03 Conduit Mulder: Hey, that's a nice tattoo, what is that? Bartender: What's it look like? Mulder: Flying saucer. You don't really believe in that stuff, do you? Bartender: I take it you don't. Mulder: No, I think it's all just a bunch of crazy people howling at the moon. -- Mulder ridicules a bartender 1X04 The Jersey Devil Scully: Mulder, it's the same story I've heard since I was a kid. It's a folk tale, a myth. Mulder: I heard the same story when I was a kid too, funny thing is, I believed it. -- the myth of the Jersey Devil Mulder: But, but what if through some fluke of nature, a human was born, who reverted to its most animal instincts, a kind of carnivorous neanderthal. Wouldn't he occupy a space above us on the food chain? Diamond: Oh sure, all he'd have to do is wait outside any fast food restaurant and eat us on the way in. -- Dr. Diamond answers Mulder's questions 1X05 Shadows Scully: You lied. You have seen this before, I can tell. You lied to them. Mulder: I would never lie. I willfully participated in a campaign of misinformation. -- dealing with the government Scully: Yeah. I'm fine. Except I have a waiting in line at the DMV sized headache. Mulder: Mine's more IRS sized. -- how well we know that frustration Scully: I think Howard Graves faked his own death. Mulder: Do you know how difficult it is to fake your own death? Only one man has pulled it off, Elvis. -- and now he's working in Burger King... Mulder: Hey, Scully. Do you believe in the afterlife? Scully: I'd settle for a life in this one. -- comment???????????????????????????????????? 1X06 Ghost in the Machine 1X07 Ice 1X08 Space Mulder: I have to admit, that fulfilled one of my boyhood fantasies. Scully: Yeah, it ranks right up there with getting a pony and learning how to braid my own hair. -- watching a space shuttle take off Mulder: Colonel Belt? Colonel Belt? Can I talk to you for a moment? Belt: You want to know why I lied to them. You�re asking yourself if this means I�d lie to you. You know what it means to be an astronaut, sir? You risk your life every time you get into your spacecraft for nothing more than the good progress of mankind. Mulder: You�ve got no argument from me, sir. You�re true American heroes. Belt: Heroes? We used to make headlines when we did our job right. Now they bury them in the back of the paper. Name me two astronauts on the last shuttle mission. [Mulder can't name any] You make the front page today only if you screw up. They only know your name if you�re the unlucky SOB sitting on five hundred tons of dynamite. That�s what they�re really waiting for. -- Colonel Marcus Aurelius Belt on the state of our society Scully: What exactly are we looking for? Mulder: X-rays, diagrams, schematics, any proof that Belt knew about a sabotage. Scully: A needle in a haystack. -- looking for evidence 1X09 Fallen Angel Scully: My assignment is to bring you back, not to help you dig yourself in deeper. Mulder: "The Last Detail" starring Dana Scully. -- Scully tries to save Mulder Koretz: Sir, I have flash traffic at 24-18. Repeated calls for ID go unanswered. And it's not in the orbital or suborbital inventory. Officer: 24-18. Isn't that where... Koretz: Same exact spot sir. Although I am reading a much larger craft his time. Officer: Meteor, Ms. Koretz. Koretz: A much larger meteor, sir. Hold on a second. We have a confirm. Whitmarsh Air Force Base is tracking... Officer: Where is it? Koretz: Well, sir. The meteor, seems to be hovering over a small town in Eastern Wisconsin. -- Chief Koretz and an officer Mulder: Do you hear that sound, Scully? Hammer and nails. They're building a gallows in the town square. Don't worry. It was only a matter of time. I'm surprised I lasted this long. -- Mulder preparing to swing in the wind Mulder: Then what can I say? How can I disprove lies that are stamped with an official seal? McGrath: That will be all, Mr. Mulder. Mulder: You can deny all the things I've seen. All the things I've discovered. But not for much longer. Because too many others know what's happening out there. And no one, no government agency has jurisdiction over the truth. -- Mulder and Section Chief McGrath 1X10 Eve Scully: Do you still believe this is UFO related? Cindy Reardon didn't see red lightning. Mulder: I don't know. The only thing similar about these girls doesn't seem to be their appearance. Scully: Well, there seems to be the random possibility that two people can have an unrelated likeness. Mulder: Who both just happened to see their father's exsanguinated. I'd like to get the odds on that in Vegas. -- the strange facts DT: Actually I was just in the neighborhood... wondered if I ever told you about the Litchfield Experiments. Mulder: No you haven't. DT: Well, it was the most interesting project. Highest level of classification. All records have since been destroyed. And those who knew of it, denied knowledge of its existence. It existed during the height of the Cold War. We got wind the Russians were fooling around with eugenics. Rather primitively, I might add. Trying to crossbreed top scientists, athletes... to come up with the superior soldier. Naturally, we jumped on the band wagon. -- Deep Throat describes American science 1X11 Fire Scully: I forgot what it was like to spend a day in court. Mulder: Well, that's one of the luxuries of hunting down aliens and genetic mutants. You rarely get to press charges. --?????????????????????????????comment 1X12 Beyond the Sea 1X13 GenderBender Mulder: The Kindred are known for their handmade stoneware pottery. They mine the clay themselves in the local hills. Scully: What's so weird about that? Mulder: The white clay in those hills is particular to that region. It's also the same substance I scraped out of the scratches on the latest victim's sides. Scully: Well, wait a minute. Aren't these people famous for their abstinence and their pure Christian ways? Mulder: Yes, but it looks as if one of them may have forgotten to clean under his fingernails. -- the killer Kindred Scully: There's something up there, Mulder. Mulder: Oh, I've been saying that for years. -- something on the Kindred's farm, not UFO's Mulder: Now... this... that's west. Scully: What does the map say? Mulder: That we should be there already. -- Mulder and Scully get lost 1X14 Lazarus Bruskin: All right, people, settle down and grab a seat. Mulder says he�s got something. Westin: What? An alien virus or new information on the Kennedy assassination? Bruskin: Hey, Mulder�s all right. You should pay attention. You might learn something from the man. -- Agents Bruskin and Westin 1X15 Young at Heart Scully: I still don't get it. What does this have to do with us? Mulder: Robbing a jewelry store is a federal crime. Scully: Thank you. -- i don't know if this is intentional ????????????????????????comment?? Scully: Mulder, it's science fiction. Mulder: Well, what would you have said twenty years ago about gene splicing, DNA fingerprinting, cloning, artificial intelligence? -- advances in science Scully: Mulder, I know what you did wasn't by the book. Mulder: Tells you a lot about the book, doesn't it? -- justification of wrong procedure 1X16 E.B.E. Byers: And, Mulder, listen to this. Vladmir Zhirinovsky, the leader of the Russian Social Democrats? He�s being put into power by the most heinous and evil force of the 20th century. Mulder: Barney? -- Byers vs. the purple dinosaur Scully: I think you give the government too much credit. I mean, the government can�t control the defecit or manage crime... what makes you think they could plan and execute such an elaborate conspiracy? -- sensible take on conspiracy Langly: Yeah, UFOs caused the Gulf War Syndrome, that�s a good one. Byers: That�s why we like you, Mulder, your ideas are weirder than ours. -- Langly and Byers Scully: Mulder, the truth is out there but so are lies. -- the truth is Scully DT: Well, I knew that you were onto the truck so I knew that down the road I would have to steer you away. That I would have to lie to you. And a lie, Mister Mulder, is most convincingly hidden between two truths. -- Deep Throat 1X17 Miracle Man Scully: Maybe we should head backstage and see what the Reverend has to say. Mulder: No, wait, wait, this is the part where they bring out Elvis. -- the melodrama of faith healing Mulder: People want to believe, you know. Daniels: Ninety-nine percent of the people in this world are fools... and the rest of us are in great danger of contagion. -- Mulder and Sheriff Daniels Scully: You've got that look on your face, Mulder. Mulder: What look is that? Scully: The kind when you've forgotten your keys and you're trying to figure out how to get back in the house. -- a common look 1X18 Shapes Ish: I sense you are different, FBI. You're more open to Native American belief than some Native Americans. You even have an Indian name - Fox. You should be Running Fox or Sneaky Fox. Mulder: Just as long as it's not Spooky Fox. -- Ish 1X19 Darkness Falls Mulder: Take a good look, Scully. Scully: What am I looking at? Mulder: Thirty loggers working a clear-cutting contract in Washington State. Rugged, manly men in the full bloom of their manhood. Scully: Right, but what am I looking for? Mulder: Anything strange, unexplainable, unlikely... boyfriend? Scully: I don�t know, I... I give up, Mulder. Mulder: You give up? Funny, that�s apparently what the Federal Forest Service has done as well. -- the FFS gave up looking for boyfriends, or strange stuff? 1X20 Tooms Scully: Ground-penetrating radar. It bounces signals off of objects or cavities. NAME: Tells you where the body is. Scully: Well, it signals if something inordinate is present. An experienced operator attempts to differentiate if the signal is a body or is stone or a hole in the ground. NAME: Differentiate? Scully: Mmm hmm. NAME: You mean he guesses? Scully: Well, it's an educated guess. -- an educated guess is better than a random stab ??????????????????OTHER_CHARACTER??? Scully: Fox... Mulder: [laughing] And I... I even made my parents call me Mulder. So... Mulder. -- don't call me Fox Scully: There�s only room for one. Mulder: You can get the next mutant. -- the next one? 1X21 Born Again Lazard: Excuse me. Could I talk to you for a second? Scully: I just started the autopsy. Lazard: Yeah. Um, I don't think he's going anywhere. -- Detective Lazard and Scully Mulder: Why is it still so hard for you to believe, even when all the evidence suggests extraordinary phenomena? Scully: Because sometimes... Mulder: What? Scully: ...looking for extreme possibilities makes you blind to the probable explanation right in front of you. -- someone should write this on Mulder's forehead (backwards, so he can read it when he looks in the mirror). The only problem is that he's always right... 1X22 Roland NAME: This is Arthur Grable. Uh, because of the massive internal damage to his body caused by the car accident, we could only preserve the head. Scully: Wouldn't your client find it somewhat inconvenient to be thawed out in the future, only to discover he had no functional mobility? -- only a minor inconvenience, I'm sure ???????????????OTHER_CHARACTER????????????????? Mulder: Well, have you ever thought about calling one of them all day long and then all of a sudden the phone rings and it's one of them calling you? Scully: Does this pitch somehow end with a way for me to lower my long distance charges? Mulder: I believe in psychic connections, and evidence suggests that it's stronger between family members, strongest of all between twin siblings that shared the same womb. Scully: Okay, maybe. But in this case, one sibling has closer ties to a frozen fudgesicle than he does to his own brother. Mulder: Arthur Grable is not dead. He's in a state of consciousness that no human has ever returned from. And what if that state allows one to develop psychic ability to a potential that the conscious mind is too preoccupied to explore or believe in? He could use that ability to control his brother to kill those scientists. Scully: But why? He's been working with these colleagues for years. Mulder: Well, that's a question that only Doctor Nollette can answer. Scully: Okay. Let's go. I have to call my brother. -- coincidences 1X23 The Erlenmeyer Flask Lacerio: Can I ask what the FBI's interest in this case would be? Mulder: The suspect matches the description of a federal fugitive. Lacerio: Really? How's that? No description of the suspect has been released. -- Mulder gets caught out by Lacerio Scully: That's all he's given us. Who is this Deep Throat character? I mean, we don't know anything about him. What his name is, what he does... Mulder: He's in a delicate position. He has access to information and indiscretion could expose him. Scully: You don't know that this isn't just a game with him. He's toying with you. Rationing out the facts. Mulder: You think he does it because he gets off on it? Scully: No. I think he does it because you do. -- questions about Deep Throat's motivations DT: Calling it a night, Mister Mulder? Mulder: My mother usually likes me home before the street lights come on. -- Deep Throat cops Mulder's sarcasm Mulder: You know, from day one, this has always been on your terms. I've gone along. Been the dutiful son. But maybe this time, we can just cut out the Obi-Wan Kenobi crap and you can save me the trouble. DT: I fear you've become too dependent on me. Mulder: Let me tell you something. I've got plenty to do without chasing down your vague leads or trying to decode your circular logic. Maybe it's you who's become too dependent on me... on my willingness to play your games. -- Deep Throat and Mulder Carpenter: My first impression is it's some kind of bacteria sample. Can I ask you where you got it? Scully: It was recovered at a crime scene. Carpenter: Well, we've come a long way from Colonel Mustard in the den with the rope, haven't we? Scully: No, I'm expecting it to turn out to be nothing. -- Dr. Carpenter examines the evidence